I'm a girl who can laugh out LOUD of most things...In fact I have a wicked sense of humor, and I have no problem laughing at gay&lesbian jokes/cartoons! This is a small collection of fun I found while surfing on the web, enjoy, and laugh ;)
I found this list at StopGeek.com and I just HAD to post it, since I laughed my fit arse off!!
01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
03) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
04) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all like many of the principles on which this great country was founded; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
06) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.
07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
08) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.
09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
I've been thinking a lot about building a gay/lesbian community online. Basically a forum for gay and lesbian people, where we can discuss all sorts of things, not only in the gay world, but EVERYTHING we care about!
It's gonna take some time to build, and I don't wanna waste too much time, if you think it's not something you would join/participate in. So I'm asking everyone of you (yes, people who take time out to read my humble blog) if you think this is a good idea at all??
I'm aware that there are similar forums out there to join, but a little competition never hurt anyone;)
Please respond, fellow queerlings!
Best regards from Mia
Mooseknuckle- Because Camel Toe Has An Ugly Sister...
10 Comments Hurled by MKF At Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Although I'm a pussyeating lesbian (sorry for the choice of words...), it doesn't mean I love women in tight tight pants... Especially when their *flabs* are showing through the damn pants.
It does not matter how hot you are, tights don't suit u, I'm sorry to inform you, but it is way sexier to leave SOME for the imagination.
Fat people, ESPECIALLY, should stay faaar faaar away from any kind of bodyhugging fabric. You need to understand, that this is not attractive to most people (I saw a program on tv with men who ADORED extremely fat women). Furthermore, it's fecking hell to undress people wearing tight spandex, imagine how impossible it is when "Miss Spandex" has been sweating a little in her ugly oufit...
STAY AWAY FROM BODYHUGGING OUTFITS LADIES (and men...)
Let this be a warning to ya.....
Alright, I'm not sure I'm doing this the right way, but here comes the rules of the game;
- We have to post these rules before we give you the facts.
- Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
- People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
- At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
- Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.
And now my 8 random facts:
1. I pick my nose too often, and my girlfriend hates it
2. I admit that I'm extremely geeky with my computer, and I would rather sit in front of my laptop than party on a friday night....
3. I secretly lust after dumb blondes, even tho it's not cool or even politically correct (whatever)
4. I'm a royalist, and I watch every darn wedding, silverwedding, birth etc. on tv!
5. I dont eat any fruit, nor vegetables (I'm gonna die, toothless, at 30 :s)
6. I'm afraid of horses (they have big teeth)
7. I'm super-shallow, although I try my best to be non-shallow...
8. I'm an extremely boring person
And now the winners:
Bullshattuck
Dorothy Surrenders
Sara's Darkness
Just a Girl In Short Shorts
Lesbiatopia
Lionboi Blues & News
Lesbianrules
Hahn At Home
1. We usually don't go for straight girls, so relax, we don't want ya!
2. We are not looking at your boyfriend, we're looking at you...
3. We are not all cat lovers...
4. Not all of us are into the whole "pride thing". Casual is bloody good!
5. Don't try and "save" us, you are not attending "Pet Rescue"... (join the peace corps or something, it'll do you good)
6. We have absolutely NOTHING against men, in fact we LOVE them to bits. Note: Only as friends!
7. Yes, we're looking at your ass (and your boobs)
8. We can out-shop a straight girl any day!
9. Yes, It IS possible to be gay and Christian/Muslim/Jewish etc. (I know a few)
10. Meat is healthy, and we eat it. So don't go calling us all vegans (ew)
11. Of course we ALL LOVE Will&Grace (it's funny, and we know how to laugh at ourselves)
12. Our private parts have no resemblence to sea food what so ever, so stop joking about it ass-hole!
13. It is a myth that lesbians have been abused as kids. Yes some have, but that's not a general thing... Bare that in mind before you comment on anything!
14. ALL lesbians are womanizing promiscuous skanks, with one thing in mind : Cunt!
15. Gay jokes are only funny if told by a gay person! Otherwise it's discriminating!! ;)
16. There is no "man" in every lesbian relaionship. Just two women, sharing it all equally!
17. Surfer chicks are HOT!
18. Ellen Degeneres is funny, not just because she is a lesbian, but it sure as hell helps!
19. Our taste in music is not limited to KD Lang, Melissa Etheridge and Ani Defranco (Personally I wouldn't listen to them unless paid for...)
20. Lesbian porn has no connection to reality, especially not when it's produced for men.
Copyright: Mialicious (and don't you dare steal this list without my concent!)
 | You scored as The Pretty-Boi Dyke, You can be a bit cocky at times and ever the heartbreaker, but no one knows that you're really just looking for true love.
What Type of Lesbian Are You? (Inspired by Curve Mag.) created with QuizFarm.com |
If ANYONE EVER compares me to Shane from the L-Word, I will personally hunt them down and drag their clit like a rubber band from here to Rome, and then let go. I am sorry, but she is not even close to hot. And I am.
Q:What did one lesbian frog say to the other?
A:Well I'll be damned....we DO taste like chicken!!
Q:What did the lesbian gas station attendant say when the leggy blonde pulled in?
A:Mind if I check under your hood?
The Top Ten Things Heterosexuals Need To Know About Gay People:
10. We didn't invent disco music so stop blaming us
9. We're not sure about Ricky Martin either.
8. We also didn't invent the colour black, but we are in complete agreement that you look better in it.
7. We are secretly glad Anne Heche is back on your team. She scares us.
6. Our so-called "radar" does not get us more cable stations or better reception
5. We think your mini-vans are sooo cute!
4. David Crosby was not Melissa Etheridge's only choice.
3. If he is using two or more hair products at any one time, yes, he is.
2. If she's won Wimbledon sixteen times, she is too.
And the number one thing that heterosexuals need to know about gay people is...
1. Relax, we don't want you! (I like that one!)
If homosexuality is a disease, lets all call in queer to work "Hello. Can't work today, still queer".
- Robin Tyler (maybe one should use that...hmmm)
How many dum lesbian jokes do you hear pr. day? I don't get any... I search for them online (geee what a "sister" I am!)
Q. How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and the other to write a folk
song about it.
Q. Why do lesbians like whales so much?
A. Because they have 50 foot tongues, and air holes on the top of their heads.
*A woman goes to the gynecologist,and upon examination, the doctor says, "Why, it's immaculate in here! What do you do to keep yourself so hygenic?"
The woman responds, "I have a woman in twice a week." (mohaha THAT'S fun!!)
*Have you heard... about the new lesbian tennis shoe called "Dyke"? (pronounced DIKEE) Yeah! It has an extra long tongue and it only takes one finger to get it off! (Laaaame imo)
Q. What's the difference between a lesbian and a dyke?
A. About $30,000 a year
Q. Why Does a Butch Have Short Hair?
A. So hair won't get in her face while eating
Q: What do you call a lesbian will fat fingers?
A: Well Hung..!!
Enough with the gay jokes already!!
